Five years goes by quick...

HE is still with me. . .a rose!

Looking back at this blog I saw that I had not posted anything since Oct. 31, 2009.  God has done so much in my life since that time.

6 months after that post - God clearlylead me to move to Ohio to be part of my grandchildren's lives!  It has been wonderful to

experience God's blessing on Kevin, Brandy and their precious family.  I love the fun dinner times with the jokes and "jinx blackout".

And listen to them memorize their AWANA verses and play sports brings tears to my eyes because I know Steve would have loved

EVERY minute of this!   I won't describe it any further or I will never finish this post without having all of us needing a box of tissues.

Stepping out in faith with the move wasBIG and leaving Kimberly was very hard.  But I knew that she would be able to handle anything

God sent her way.  God directed her to a wonderful organization to grow her professionally.  If you would ask her how her job was she

would reply - "I love my job"!  

Living life without Steve has been BIG,but I serve a BIG God.  And believe it or not - God took me to Morocco and Indonesia to provide

childcare in those countries.  This "queen of fear" trusted God to fly her to the other side of the world.  The airline messed up and I 

received a free trip to Oklahoma City to see my sister who I never could afford to do before.  

In the fall of 2012 God placed me at "All the Children of the World Academy".  It is really cool that God allowed me to care for the children around the world then gave me a job with that name.  God has lead me on all these adventures and more!

Saturday, Oct. 5, 2008 was the day that Steve went home.  There were pieces of that day that will be forever embedded in my mind.  

Since that time when life would get difficult, God would whisper to my heart, "I will be with you".  Five years is a long time and I wanted

to remember Oct. 5, 2013 in a special way.  I did not want to work at Kohl's (I work there part time), I didn't want to be alone and Kimberly

was too far away.  I just wanted to be with someone who knew Steve.  Sometimes it is hard to remember happy times and I wanted to

remember some of the fun times we had together!

Our friends, the Hills, from Bethel Baptist Church moved to West Virginia just before Steve's passing.  I worked with Nancy and Steve

served on the Shepherd's Council with Matthew.   I think Matthew ate more soup at Soupy's than he did at home.  I contacted them to

see how far they were from Columbus and I asked if they had any plans for the weekend.  It was only 4 hours and they had no plans so

I invited myself!   They welcomed me with open arms and Abby's warm bed.   Abby was one of my students once upon a time.  Nancy

began to offer things to do but I said that this was God's weekend and whatever you plan - I will take it as God's plan for me.  The drive was

easy and the weather was perfect.  It was fun seeing the school and church where they are serving.  Saturday the plan was to have lunch

under the arch bridge at the New River.  We packed a picnic lunch and headed to the big boulders on the river bank.  After lunch I ventured

out on the boulders for a walk being careful not to make a "memory" by breaking an ankle.  I felt great and it was fun!  Ahead of me was Kayla and Josiah (another one of my students).  Kayle yells back, "I found a rose".  I thought it was an old plastic or silk one.  She came

to us and showed it to us!  It was realand it even had thorns.  There it was - a beautiful long stem red rose!  I took off the thorns so we could hold it without drawing blood.  I began to wonder how a long stem red rose got in a little pool of water that far from the riverunharmed.  It

was beautiful!  If someone had dropped it from the bridge it would have gone downstream from us.  If it was thrown from the other small bridge it would have traveled through white water and would have been crushed going to the boulders.  There was NO explanation for this

rose and Nancy verbalized my thoughts - GOD sent me a rose!  Five years from Steve's homegoing - God sent me a rose!  This rose confirmed to me that HEloves me, HE is with me and I am right where HE wants me to be!!  WOW!!  The rest of the day it was in the van

with us and never wilted.  Abby put it in a vase for me when we got home and now it is in the process of drying out so I can keep it as a reminder of God's gift to me.  I am so glad that GOD is alive and still cares for us.  He loves me and He loves you.  Please seek Him now because there is coming a day REAL soon when He will return to judge this world.  I would love for you to be reunited with Mr. Steve someday.  Read John 3:16.

Oh, by the way, Saturday nightcontinued to be AWESOME as we laughed at Steve stories.  One time I could almost hear him laugh and many of you remember that laugh!!  Sunday was AWESOME also as Matthew lead us in worship at church.  Matthew chose the song, "In

Christ Alone" - one of my absolute favorites!  Check it out on YouTube.  

I will never forget October 5, 2008 nor will I forget October 5, 2013!!  GOD will never forget me either!!

     "I will be with you;  I will never leave you or forsake you".  Joshua 1:5

May GOD be with you as well - I love you all!       

I wanted to send this to you because - just because!!    I will have this posted hopefully with a picture of the rose enclosed!!

Thanks for reading this and being such a blessing to me during these last 5 years!!   I love you all!!

Life goes on! God is with us!

Well it has been almost 13 months since Steve went home to be with our Lord! There have been times that the tears would just flow as we remembered the things we would do together. Today I enjoyed a good breakfast that he would have fixed for me. Corned beef hash and eggs. I even asked him to make it - he couldn't because he was fixing breakfast for "the KING". That's right - life isn't all about me - it IS about HIM!! We all miss him dearly but we KNOW that we will see him again and we WILL be together forever! In fact, this week God reinforced that to me in James 4. Verse 14 says that we don't even know what will happen tomorrow - we are a mist that appears for a while and vanishes. Steve was a GREAT mist - big mist too - that hurricaned into our lives. He certainly left his mark on EVERYONE he met. Even strangers he met on the airplane.

Yesterday I received an anonymous gift postmarked DesMoine, IA. Have any of you been in Iowa lately? Because the person obviously doesn't know that Steve passed away. It was addressed to Steven and Jan Deichert. There was a note inside that read - Thank you for your help when I first graduated from college. No doubt in my mind that Steve had monetarily helped someone out 20 plus years ago. AND no doubt that GOD had this person send this to me yesterday! I recently had to have work done on my 95 Saturn. I was dreaming of a new car but God had said to be content with what I have. GOD provided this money to cover the costs of these repairs!!!

This year has been interesting as our family continues to "go on" without Steve or Dad. I'm grateful that the grandgirls still fondly remember "Poppop". I am glad I can hope on a plane and see them for the weekend like I did Columbus weekend. What a wonderful surprise for the girls and me.

I am excited that the Lord has provided a full time benefit paying job for Kimberly!! It was almost a year to the day that she lost her job God provided this new one. She was working part time in a local hospital and was able to secure another job in the same field. God has intertwined both to give her expertise in her work.

Kevin has applied for a promotion at his job and is working many hours - we are thankful that he does have a job! We have been down that road before as a family - work is good. Brandy is doing a wonderful job as a mom and loves it! And of course I know it is debatable but I do have the best grandchildren in the world! Anna, Ella and Derek! I can't wait to be with them again.

And I am joyful as I work at Joyful Noise Preschool! I love it and the ladies I work with are the VERY BEST!! They are great encourager that love me and most of all love the Lord! They are taking good care of me.

I thank the Lord for HIS word and how it encourages me daily. Now I NEED to lean on HIM - no one else on earth can help me. It's just God and I! He has shown me this year that life is all about HIM - not us - we selfish people! God is sovereign and in control of EVERYTHING! There have been many times that it seems like God is sitting right next to me! I praise the Lord for Christian radio speakers! God uses them to encourage me and keep me going. Greg Laurie is on my radio many times and God is using his messages to confirm that God is REAL!
Feb. 13th (my birthday) Greg said, "Keep on" referring to Philippians 3:13. Kevin called me that day and at the end of the conversation said - "mom - just keep on." Then a few weeks ago when I was feeling a little overwhelmed - Greg said again, "keep on". These words of encouragement keep me "keeping on"! AS Dad Hare always said - "keep on keeping on"!

Keep on my FRIENDS - 1. God is with us! 2. We belong to God! (If we have surrendered our lives to HIM). 3. We should be doing the will of God! 4. We need to believe God! HE knows what is best for us!

Thank you for letting me share my heart. And thank you God for continuing to care for me - even better than Steve!

I love you all -- Mom, Mrs. Steve, Janice

Continuing the "firsts"

Today is February 7th and we continue through the adventure of going through the first special days without Steve. We did pass over his birthday pretty well. It was January 19th. Kevin did not want us to be alone so he came in for the week with the family. He had off for Martin Luthur King's birthday and took off the rest. I made him promise that they would not come if there was any threat of snow. He said that one snowflake falling would keep me indoors - haha. They did arrive and return safely. We had a wonderful time. It was great to be together! The grandchildren really make a difference. Sleeping was a bit to get used too - but what is a leg in the face when we are all family? Poor Derek did not like the pack and play and it made for a long week for Kevin and Brandy. I did LOVE to see him jumping in the doorway with the jumpy thing. Every parent should have one. I am really thankful that God planned that trip even though when they left I had a difficult time saying "see ya later".

That brings us to today. To update you - Kimberly has been placed on perdium with Virtua Hospital. She really likes it. But with perdium she only works every now and then. She is only scheduled for 2 days during the month of February. She was scheduled to work today - she did work with a happy spirit. We went out to Redstone Restaurant this evening and it was very good. Steve would have loved the food and the presentation. The broiled sea scallops were VERY good. Kimberly and the ribs and they were excellent. We figured that Steve would have had a steak - NY Strip or Prime Rib. Any guesses? There were definite times of crying at the table. But it was good to talk and reflect on where we have been and how God's plan has been executed.

Kimberly has an interview doing activity planning at a private school. We'll see what God's plan is. I REALLY hope that God will show her what is next because $$ is getting a bit scarce for her. She has been seeking the Lord and He has been with her. She is CONFIDENT in His plan!

I think we will just skip over the next birthday. Mine on Friday. His morning was hard enough thinking about no daddy to say happy birthday to "half pint". I know this is part of the process but it is hard.

Kimberly is out with her friends watching a movie so I guess I'll just go to bed and read my college testbook and go over my words for the quiz on Tuesday night. Yuk!

Thanks for your continual love for us.

widow Janice and daughter Kimberly

"empty table syndrome"

Well, it is less than an hour until a new year begins. . .

My - oh my - what a year this has been. God has surely had us on some adventure - huh?!

A year a go tonight I was sitting with Steve watching "the ball" come down and Dick Clarke in Times Square. We had just enjoyed a holiday with Brandy, Kevin, the girls and Kimberly. I think we even put the girls to bed upstairs and played a game of Rumicube - one of our vacation favorites. We felt a little "funny" because we that next Christmas would be different. Kevin and Brandy had shared that they would be moving to Ohio and that their days in NJ would be over. The changes began at the very beginning of 2008!

January took the Kevin Deichert family to Ohio and we began life without the constant little voices calling for "Poppop". You see, Steve would sit upstairs in his recliner and read stories to the girls and cut them fruit and Brandy would take a break (?) and go to the grocery store. This was a system that worked for everyone. Now I would tell Steve that we would see the girls in X -amount of days and he would say "no" they have been gone X-amount of days. I know he REALLY missed them. I would re-iterate that this was God's plan and we had to accept it.

God allowed Steve to attend the wrestling tournaments with his brother and watch his nephew wrestle - boy he liked going. They would truck out with the wheelchair and park in the "handicapped" parking and enjoy the evening. I think Steve just like being on the floor in the wheelchair and close to the team to smell the sweat. Yuk!

April came and we headed to Ohio to spend a week at Apple Valley Resort. We were sooo excited. Dr. DiMenna gave permission for Steve to swim because his foot had healed and was able to get wet. Steve's desire of his heart had come true. He couldn't wait to get into the water with the girls. Everyday we swam. It was an Olympic sized pool and we were the only ones in it most of the time. We all had fun. We also borrow Daniel's Wii and had a good time with that as well. We enjoyed my nephew's wedding in Cleveland and then had to head home to NJ.

The summer came with some more changes. I resigned from my teaching at Shining Lights Preschool and moved to Joyful Noise Christian School in Marlton. God has taken care of this transition and I love what I am doing. I began working in the summer to get familiar with the procedures and facilities. I was helping them because another staff member had lost her husband to cancer.

THEN July 15th a day that none of us will ever forget. The AVM and off to a most difficult adventure God has ever delivered us. There have been different chapters to our adventure of life and just like the others - God WAS with us 100% of the way. We both sensed God with our decisions. These were difficult valley days for Steve. Dr. Mike Renzi said that it was "the worst". Steve shared with me that it was like going through hell. He wouldn't wish it on his worst enemy.

Oct. 4th we were supposed to board a plane for Disney World to vacation in our timeshare with the family - this was "our" plans not God's. We knew that Steve would take a bit longer to recover so we moved it to May so he could get stronger. Steve aspirated that day and decided to opt not to be put back on a ventilator and wait for God to take him home.

On Oct. 5th Steve experienced a place better than Disney - he experienced the presence and glory of God! No sun or moon because God's glory shines 24/7. No more night terrors and two great feet that can take him everywhere he wants to go!

God has been Wonderful to me since Steve has gone home. I KNOW He is with me constantly. When this began I said to the Lord - Steve was my rock and HE said -"no I am your rock!" and He has been! There have been times of fear and the Lord has placed a song that talks about not being afraid of the darkness - if God be for us who can be against us? or a preacher that preaches just (?) what I am feeling.

Are there times of sadness? Yes, most definitely. It hits us all at different times. Saturday we went to the Columbus Zoo and there was a building about the "reef" I remember Steve LOVING the ocean at Curacao and swimming with the tropical fish. I lost it that time.

Right now our biggest problem is fixing food. Steve took great care of feeding all of us. He made the kids lunches from day one. I knew if I went out at night time or on a retreat my kids would be well taken care of. It has take me a long time to make a decent cup of coffee. Yes, I was spoiled - Steve would make my breakfast and 10 course lunch - I would get dressed, come down and eat and leave. When ever we ate he cooked - I can - I just haven't. And everything in my brain is 7 or more. I am basically going through "EMPTY TABLE SYNDROME".

Kimberly and I are still doing some adjusting. She isn't on a regular schedule and PLEASE pray that she would find contentment in the job God has for her whatever that is. Meals are still a chore for both of us. When you have been married and lived with a chef for so many years - this may take a while.

Well, thank you for your mind. We are all going through this process as well as we can.

I found this in Steve's papers and I would like to share it with you on this New Year 2009 -

"When we disobey God
we defy His authority and despise His Holiness
When we fail to trust God
we doubt His sovereignty and question His goodness."

On that note I close - I don't know where each one of you are spiritually but God LOVES you and Mr. Steve loved you as well. Mr. Steve's desire for everyone was that they come to a personal knowledge of the God of the universe! God has a plan for you and HIS desire is that you seek HIM.

HAPPY NEW YEAR - 2009 One year closer to being with our God and one year closer to being with all those who are temporarily separated from us.

Three Months Ago today

It has been exactly 12 weeks since the start of the roller coaster Mom and I have been on called "AVM burst."

My family and I would like to thank all of you who have read this blog and have left comments to encourage us and Mr. Steve. I would like to thank those who made it out for the funeral and/or viewing last week. It was such a testimony to see all of the people impacted by my father's life. He was a great man, he left a legacy. I am proud to call him my dad. I said at the funeral, I loved my father, but I also liked him a lot. He was the best man I ever knew.

There are a lot of people in the world that never get to meet their parents. Some children have terrible parents that they run away from. There are some that have good parents that watch them get married and have children of their own become successful and get old. And then they bury their parents.

But then there are a few of us who end up burying our parents for one reason or another when we are just starting out in life. I never thought I would say my life hasn't begun and I'm already through college. I thought in college that my life began and was now over because those were supposed to be the best years of my life.

I am not saying that they were terrible or that they were the best years of my life but they were a time where my father was alive. I am thankful that my father saw me graduate from college. I'm glad he saw his daughter do something he himself did not do.

I am thankful for all the disagreements we had before, during and after college. I am glad my father loved me that he cared about me. He was proud of me, I know that.

My wish now isn't a regret that I have; but a request I now have. All I want to do is talk to him. I'm not sure what I would say or if I would say anything. I want to give him a big hug and tell him I love him.

My father was not scared on his deathbed. He was not worried about the future of his family that he would not see. My dad had the clarity of mind to tell his son, "take care of your mom." He had the right mind to ask for me "where is my daughter," and hold my face and call me "precious."

What I will think about for years to come is what my father said over and over the last night of his life. It was when mom and I stayed with him at the hospital. He said "Its OK girls, I'll be fine."

I know that you were touched by my father's life in some way or fashion. If you have a story or a memory of my father, please email me your story (kimberlydeichert@yahoo.com). I will be compiling a lot of things about my dad over the next few weeks and months. I want people to know (his grandchildren) what their grandfather was all about.

Thank you to all of you who have read this blog even in its smallest part or if you have stayed with us over the long hall and read its entirety. Mom and I would agree that this helped not only you, but us as well. Some day I will look back and read all of the entries but that's not today.

Thank you all Sandy Covers that came up for the funeral it was great to see you there! Mr. Steve would have been very emotional have known you would come up for it! Mom and I will try to put something together so we can all reunite under better circumstances.

Again, thank you for your continued prayer support. Mom and I will need it these next few weeks, and even months and years as we grieve over the loss of a dear friend, father, spouse, etc.

Hopefully in the next week or so I will be posting a video of dad so stay tuned for a few more posts.

And in case you didn't know...there have been over 700 people that have viewed this blog!!!!

Funeral Arrangements

Here is the obituary that the funeral home put together for us today. We are now on our way to discuss the service plans at church. Thank you for your comments, thoughts and prayers.

Keep 'em comin...


Follow this link for the obituary...

http://www.northeastobits.com/posts.cfm?st=34&obit=28057

Home with Jesus

I'm staring at my fingers on the keys of this computer, and I can't seem to know the right words to write.

Some of you may know, and some of you may not, but my father finished his race today around 8:00pm.

Yesterday around 6pm he choked on some water and Mom was the only one home so she called 911. They took dad to the ER and we discussed our options. The options were to put him on a ventilator for 15 to 20 days then talk about a trach and surgery on the lungs. When he aspirated something went into his lungs. Dad was awake and able to talk so we talked with him about what we could do. He said that he did not want to be all wired up. And he understood that he would be kept comfortable; but that there was nothing more to be done. He was put on a morphine drip from then on.

So last night Mom and I stayed in his room with him. He had difficulty breathing through the night. Kevin and Brandy drove through the night so they could be here because no one knew what would happen.

Today my dad met his grandson. Held his grandson and talked to him. Dad also saw Anna and Ella today and told them he loved them.

People in church were told of dad's condition and that he was now considered under "comfort care." Several families stopped by to see him and he had a GREAT last day on earth! He was laughing and joking and having a good time.

I showed up around 4pm (I left after Kevin & Brandy got there so I could take the girls home). It was around 6pm that Dad was having a severe time breathing. Mom called Kevin to come back to the hospital.

It was from around 6:30 until 8:30 that Dad had a tough time. We increased his morphine until he was comfortable and he went home to be with Jesus around 8:30pm.

The nursing staff was amazing at the hospital! I am so glad they were there to help him and us! They were crying along side of us as we watched him take his last breath.

Thank you all for following in this journey we have been on for a few months.

I'll post information about the funeral arrangements, etc. tomorrow so check it tomorrow.

God has healed my father and I am so grateful for the peace I have knowing everything is going to be all right. My dad is up in heaven seeing the face of His Savior! I will miss him, any daughter would, but I know God is still worthy to be praised no matter what happens in my life. Thank you heavenly Father for giving me such an amazing Dad!